I’d be lying if I didn’t say I was frustrated. Lying if I said I didn’t regret going back for my masters. Lying if I said there’s nothing in life that I would have done different in my 20s. I have a lot on my mind and my plate and I don’t exactly know how I feel about anything at the current moment. All I know is that I feel that my future is getting mildly choked by my past and that I feel stuck in a place that I don’t know that I want to be in. But no one put me in that place but myself. No one can be held accountable but this girl right here. I have a bit of sick recognition of this fact and as a result, don’t really know what I’m thinking. I had a meeting at school yesterday that was frustrating and disheartening and long story short, I may not be graduating in December as I hoped. I am very turned off by higher education at the moment and in all honesty if I wasn’t this far invested, financially and etc, I would throw it all away and never look back. I’m off track in so many areas of my life, while being on track in so many others. A total walking paradox. My horoscope said to stay positive today. To fight through and count my blessings. I do. And I am. But right now I’m feeling more frustrated than optimistic in a lot of areas and the positivity isn’t exactly seeping out. But what can I do really but just keep going? Nothing. That’s all I can do is pull off the weeds and the muck and stand up tall even when I feel like curling up and ignoring the world. Pisces escapism isn’t gonna work for me now, as comforting and familiar it looks.